“It takes courage” to confront a stranger to start a connection. Alex Williams addressed making friends for those over forty in his New York Times essay – Friends of a Certain Age.
As people approach midlife, the days of youthful exploration, when life felt like one big blind date, are fading. Schedules compress, priorities change and people often become pickier in what they want in their friends…often people realize how much they have neglected to restock their pool of friends only when they encounter a big life event, like a move…
Worth rereading when everyone around you seems to have something to do that does not include you.
The sidebar by Jesse McKinley in Some Friendly Advice offers 6 quick ways to find a friend; one is to “go it alone.” In that spirit, I took myself to cooking demonstrations celebrating Julia Child, who will soon celebrate her 100th birthday. People who like to eat and cook are usually friendly, and I did find new friends: Kathy, a writer from Australia, and Devra, the Coco Chanel of beautifully made ETSIS sunhats.
The best advice from the articles – besides getting over yourself – appreciate the BFF’s you have and look for a casual friend or two – “better than total isolation.” As the Girl Scouts sang – “one is silver, the other is gold.”
For more musings on articles, go to Read Between the Lines
Making friends in middle age is hard. Whenever I make a BFF they eventually move away!
Thanks for the link – I’m going to check it out. I could use some more friends. Well done for following the advice and finding yourself some new friends!
It’s also nice to have friends through posting that I’ve never met in person. Thanks for staying connected.
True, that IS really nice, too. There are several people I “talk” to several times per week and it’s nice to have them around. But meeting people in real-life is just a bit nicer. You know, how we book bloggers always try to meet up? 🙂
yes, if I ever get to your side of the world, I will look for you, and you should me, if you wander this way. Are there formal meetings like conferences and such that are fun to attend?
Not sure if there are. I’ve met up with Dutch book bloggers when we’ve organised it ourselves, but never as part of a conference or something like that.